The SnapClap

Space Shuttle Endeavour, originally uploaded by larddesigns.

I don’t know about you guys, but the space shuttle is just amazing to me, it has always been. I guess seeing this picture just renewed my sense of awe. Sometimes I just think about the amazing things that we have accomplished as Americans; like, the space shuttle, the internet, single handedly ruining the world’s economy while at the same time fighting an unwinable two pronged war in a country we have no business going to in the first place. What do we do for an encore?!

photo by: Foto Bocch

My wife and I went to Bones a few weeks ago. Bones is like Atlanta’s Premier steak house. They had a bone in Filet Mignon that was just ridiculous. At any rate, Bones has free Valet Parking.  So we valeted and went inside.  We had our steaks and potatoes and what not, and it was time to go home.  We went outside and presented the valet our ticket, he hurriedly retrieved our key, ran over to the car and pulled it around right in front of our feet. He opened the door for my wife and handed me the keys. I hit him with a five spot, hopped in and drove away.

Almost immediately we began to smell something.  It was absolutely rank.  I knew it didn’t come from me, and I figured it wasn’t coming from my wife either; she’s too beautiful for something so foul smelling to emanate from her.  So we looked at each other kinda puzzled.  That’s when I surmised that it had to be the valet. Damn valet, he took the liberty of passing gas in our car.  And to think, I tipped him a five spot and what I get in return? Fresh ass gas from the valet. Thanks valet guy.

So we rolled down the widows and opened the sunroof and tried to air the car out. But the smell would not dissipate. Did the valet guy have an accident in the car as well? Where is this smell coming from? That’s when my wife reveled that she spilled some of her lunch, which included yogurt, into her lunch bag. She thought that she cleaned it out. But alas, some of it had gotten it a small compartment of the bar and had began to rot.

Upon this realization we went from being mad at the gassy valet to being embarrassed by a stinky car. We wondered what the valet was thinking? Maybe there’s some blog out there by this valet, talking about our stinky car or something?  The moral of the story is, don’t tip free valet guys. Nah, I’m just kidding, the moral of the story is if you’re gonna valet, don’t pack your lunch that day.

You know, before I moved to atlanta, everyone said it was so fantastic.   But now, they changing Buckhead up, getting rid of all the fun stuff and making it like 5th avenue in New York, there’s an incredible drought, and its starting to get colder, alot ealier than I anticiapted.  Not to mention, i went to wedding last weekend that was just awesome, except for the fact that one of the waiters spilled about a half a pitcher of ice cold sweet tea on my suit jacket, while I was wearing it.

I’m starting to think that I missed the Atlanta.  You know?  Maybe the city peaked already and we got here late or something?  Well, based on the rule of averages, things have gotta get better right?  Although, getting better in this instance means a very wet winter, thats cool; rain is cool with me.  However, I must admin I’m a little scarred after getting a pitcher of sweet tea spilled on me.

Photo by www.thesnapclap.com.

I was on the boardwalk the other day and I spied a ‘hidden’ video camera.  I know they were installed for safety and what not, but the amount of cameras I’ve seen recently is quite disturbing.  I mean, back in the days things were safer, and there were less violent crimes, but we didn’t have no damn cameras looking at folks 24/7, you know?  Kinda makes you wonder what the cameras are really for?

This morning while riding a DC Metro Train to work I noticed an advertisement.  The ad featured extremley detailed instructions on how to protect yourself and others from the flu.  You know; wash your hands, cover your mouth, all that jazz.  Really and truly, I don’t understand why they have instructions for something that basic but overlook the real important stuff, like how to ride the Metro properly!

Look, I might be jaded or too “New York” or whatever you wanna call me, but DC folks, ya’ll don’t do public transportation properly, you just don’t.  You know how to stop the spread of germs, but you’re horrible when it comes to public transportation.   So, in lieu of a public service  to educate riders sponsored by the DC Metro, I’ve come up with my own list. 

Rules for Riding the DC Metro

For Metro Passengers:

1. Take your bag off – I’m tired of getting knocked around by your bookbag; or trying to shuffle around your shopping bags.  Take your bags off and sit them in your lap or on the floor.
2. Move to the center of the car/ back of the bus – There’s MAD room back there people!  Why stand on top of me, when you can sit next to that crazy looking federal employee.
3. Don’t stand in the doorway – This is self explanitory.
4. Collapse your baby carriages – Your carriage takes up the whole isle!  Wait a minute, how old is your kid anyway?!?  Listen, if his feet touch the ground when he’s in the stroller, guess what; he’s too old for a stroller.
5. Say Excuse me (!) – Come on!  How rude.  Just say excuse me and I’ll get out of your way.  And vice/versa; when I say excuse me, you should get outta my way, don’t just stand in the doorway; MOVE!
6. Be courteous of seniors/pregnant women – A co-worker of mine was pregnant, and  no one ever, never ever gave up their seat for her?  What kinda people ride the Metro and won’t give up their seats, for a woman who’s preggers?  What gives?
7. Let the passengers exit, BEFORE you attempt to enter the car – I CANNOT STRESS THIS ONE ENOUGH.  You cannot enter, before we exit; it just don’t work that way.  Be patient, wait till I get off the train before you take my seat.

For Metro Employees:

1. Easy on the brakes – Bus, train, it doesn’t matter.  The Metro drivers in DC are all herkey jerky on the brakes!  Drivers, please be considerate, there’s a whole bunch of people in here, and they all got bookbags on, and they refuse to move to the back of the bus.  When I ride the bus in DC, I find myself holding on tight even when I sit down!  That’s unacceptable!
2. Clean Metro buses thoroughly - I don’t understand why every bus in DC smells like urine.  It’s just not possible.  Every bus smells like urine!?!  And it’s not like its just in the back of the bus, or the front or whatever; its like a ubiquitous urine, you know?  No matter where you sit, it smells like a port-a-potty, and that’s no way to start or finish a day.  (Notice I said clean thoroughly.  Because sometimes they do a half ass job, so you smell Pine-sol and urine which is almost worse than urine alone.)  
3. Be short when announcing Metro station stops – I kid you not, there’s a conducter on the Metro, who thinks she’s an auctioneer.  She never stops talking over the train’s intercom system!  She’s like, “This is the Red Line to, Shhhaaaaaaaaaaaaady Grove.”  And then proceeds to tell the weather the time, the stock report, horoscopes.  I exaggerate, but only a little.  She really doesn’t shut up.  How many times are you gonna tell us what time it is?  We know what time it is fool, its one minute later than then last time you told me!  Please spare me; I have a watch, thanks.

Now look, you might get mad, and say I’m hating or whatever but you know what?  I like the Metro.  you guys got a really cool looking subway system, with the lights at the edge of the platform that pulse when the train is arriving.  You guys actually have a schedule with a display that alerts you to the next train.  Come on, that’s COOL!  Plus the whole “left side walk right side stand” thing you do on the escalators is genius! 

So, I’m mentioning the above suggestions out of love.  Consider it, corrective criticism, or a public service announcement or something. In New York, these things are second nature to us; we’re had a subway for like a hundred years!  So, I understand that someone has got to tell you DC folks how it’s done.  I don’t expect for you guys to get it right away, but if you do anything, just please take your bookbags off; it’s the least you could do, thanks!

Photo: studio113

I’ll be so happy when Barry Bonds breaks Hammerin’ Hanks all time homerun record. Don’t get me wrong, Hank Aaron is pillar of baseball greatness, never to be tarnished or diminished. But this is about principles, to me. In my view, baseball turned a blind eye to the drugs as they did in the 1985 cocaine scandal. They knew what went on in their clubhouses. If a child OD’s on cocaine in his parent’s house, guess who’s criminally negligent. Ain’t nothing supposed to go down in your house, that you don’t know about; and baseball knew. Even if baseball didn’t know, . they’re still negligent, because this is foreseeable, and they should have known or taken adequate precautions to guard against these abuses. Furthermore, in light of the ’85 cocaine scandal, the argument could be made that MLB was straight-up reckless because they did not institute a strict zero-tolerance drug policy.

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Vacamas 2004
Originally uploaded by little sausage

This might look like a random trail in the woods that runs along some mysterious PVC pipe. But alas, ask anyone who has spent any significant time at Camp Vacamas in West Milford, New Jersey, and they’ll tell you what this is.

I’ve walked this path a million times, . . .well at least several hundred, but it seems like a million; having spent more than 10 summers at Camp Vacamas. It might sound corny but Vacamas was a really, really sepcial part of my childhood. The things I did there seemed impossible at home. I became empowered, I guess, as a result of the challenges I faced at Vacamas, not to mention the sheer all out fun!

This pathway, goes around the Lake Larriween from the manor House, to the fishing dock and around to sunfish beach. I used to walk around camp without a flashlight, until one night I stumbled over a section of the slippery when wet PVC pipe pictured here, and took a spill. I was alright, but after that, I got a flashlight (or as my UK folks call it; a ‘torch’).
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According to Nobodysmiling.com Lupe Fiasco’s business partner Charles ‘Chilly’ Patton just got sentenced to 44 years on heroin charges.  Prosecutors did not present evidence of a link between the 1st and 15th Record Company and drug dealing but the connection ‘was implied’.

Didn’t the Kennedy’s make their money bootleggin during the prohibition and then clean up their money and run for office?  I guess this business model never fails, unless you sell heroin and get caught.  But then again, the money is made and Lupe is one of the hottest rappers on the planet right now. Mission Accomplished!

Based on this model, perhaps we’ll see little Sean Carter Jr become president one day.  I know he’s not born yet, but between, Beyonce and the Jigga-man, who wouldn’t vote for this kid?  He’s a shoe in.  Never to know the run down row houses his pops sold smack from in Brooklyn and Newark.  I guess that’s why Jigga pulled the plug on the Dream Hampton assisted autobiography. 

In a totally unrelated topic I just found out that they are tearing down Astroland in Coney Island.  What the hell am I doing in DC, I need to be back in Brooklyn!  I need to take pics of Astroland like everyday for a week before they tear it down.  What a sad day that’ll be.  What’s the world coming to.

Anyway, I heard the single and saw Kaye’s new video.  What’s this dude talking about right?  I really wasn’t feeling it?  Maybe I should listen again or something.  I have no doubt that the album will be full of surprises and it’ll be dope, but this lead off single just threw me for a loop.  Word on the street is the album is getting pushed back again.  They need to stop frontin’.  I know hip hop aint sellin’ like it used to, but this is Kanye.  He’ll move 150 thousand units the first week after shipping platinum.

Lastly, Al Sharpton is continuing to do his part in ‘cleaning’ up Hip hop.  He’s bringing his campaign to Detroit in conjunction with the NAACP’s mock funeral for the N-word.  At a press conference in front of the Motown Museum Sharpton spoke of the 60’s and James Brown and how women were not denigrated nor was the N-word used.

I don’t know I still got mixed emotions.  Yeah in the 60’s we struggled, we didn’t have it like we do today.  Today we use the N-word, although we’ve made tremendous inroads and some black folks are really wealthy.  It seems backwards, but it’s true.

50 cent owns 10% share of Glaceau, makers of Vitamin Water.  And on May 25, 2007, The Coca-Cola Company agreed to buy Glaceau in a cash deal valued at $4.1 billion.  Now, I know this is all ‘paper money’ but technically that means 50 is well on his way to half a billion dollars!  But he uses the N-word and denigrates women.  At the same time the machine that is 50, has probably paid for salaries and doctors and put food on the plates of many, many people.

So, which is right?  Who is the ‘better’ person?  A James Brown type person, who influenced a generation with positivity and creativity but beat his wife and abused drugs (may he rest in peace, I’m just stating the facts) OR; a 50 cent type person who denigrates people publicly but privately funds an empire that may employ hundreds if not thousands of people.

The aforementioned Kennedy’s were dirty for a point.  No ones pointing any fingers at them.  Does that mean what they did is ok, or just in the past.  Is it ok if 50 goes straight and never has another booty shake in his video? 

Yes, these words are bad.  No question.  I’m just having a hard time drawing the line.  I find myself constantly reevaluating what’s ok and what’s not ok.  Is it cool to have nudity on TV (Europe does it and they are far less violent than we are as a society) should prostitution be legal, should we ban the use of the N-word, should we even care about the N-word, should weed be legal, should abortion be legal, so actors can say the N-word and rappers can’t, actors can depict violence (to a chainsaw massacre degree) but rappers can’t talk about it?  Meanwhile, they’re all making millions.  I’m sitting at home trying to draw the line and they’re all making money hand over fist.  I guess that’s just the Nacirema Dream, right?  Maybe little Marquis Jackson will be Sean Carter Jr’s running mate.  The slogan will be “Carter/Jackson 2040 - These Niggas aint Playing”

We got the them semi automatics
we got them revolvers
we them [people] you should get at
if you got a problem
when them hollow tips hit ‘em
man thats just somthing
we got them Lugers them Rugers them M1’s
and they’re all for sale.
- A Teem featuring 50 Cent
  ”Guns for Sale”

How many of ya’ll saw Chris Rock’s last HBO special?  It was classic Chris Rock, one of his best routines ever.  He killed.  It was especially funny to me, because Rock’s comedic observations are pointed, witty and smart.  One of his observations was about censorship and the role of the media in America and how it relates to black folks.  He said, a white man makes guns, makes a ton of money, cool.  A Black man says ‘gun’ in a rap song; and there’s a congressional hearing.

Yeah, it’s funny; funny ’cause there’s truth to it.  At any rate, the other day I was watching FutureWeapons on the Discovery channel.  This show is pretty ill.  I mean, I’m a techie type cat so I’m always interested in learning about the newest technological weaponry and such.  I used to read popular mechanics from time to time (I stopped reading Pop Mechanics after they had this article talking about America’s superior technological advantages in weaponry etc; I felt like the article was straight propaganda, you know?) needless to say I’m somewhat interested in this stuff. 

But then, it hit me.  This show, which is hosted by a former Navy Seal, displays real, actual guns and weaponry.  This dude be lettin’ off with all types of gats.  Stuff that’s not even out yet.  He’s shooting armor piercing slugs; he’s shooting the most accurate sniper rifle ever made.  I mean this guy is really lettin’ off real rounds, you know? Check this clip out.  He’s shootin’ target dummies with helmets and Kevlar vests; rather he’s shooting THROUGH helmets and Kevlar!

Meanwhile, the guns and violence in music videos is censored.  Now, I’m not suggesting, that the marijuana leaf emblem on Dr.Dre’s hat should NOT be censored.  But what I am saying is that, it’s odd that the hyper reality in music videos is censored, but the actual violence of shows like Futureweapons is NOT censored. 

Maybe it has something to do with the fact that the army spent about 1.4 billion on advertising in 2006. (YES, . .1.4 BILLION DOLLARS!!!!!!) I’m sorry but WTF!

This is like straight propaganda.  Word UP.  There’s no other way to say it.  We live in an environment where the media outlets choose what we see and do not see and I refuse to think that they have my best interest at heart.  Hell NO!

They want me to fear black men; they want me to think that black men are violent, that I need to be protected from them; that I need to lock my car doors when I’m driving through Bed Stuy.  SO, they capitalize on imagery and paint this evil picture.  They create a specter and apparition of super bad blackness that needs to be censored.  Meanwhile, . .we’ll inundate you with freaking Army commercials between the videos.  Commercials which clearly and plainly show guns and military weaponry which are utilized to kill actual people right now! WAAAY more people than ice cube ever even THOUGHT about killing in one of his songs.  YET AND STILL, . Ice Cube’s album Amerikka’s Most Wanted has a Parental Advisor Sticker on it.  We need parental advisory stickers on these damn Army Commercials!  (WARNING, THESE DOD FOOLS DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU AND WILL FLY ACCROSS THE GLOBE TO KILL PEOPLE THAT LOOK LIKE YOU AND THEN THEY’LL ABONDON YOU WHEN YOU COME BACK TO THE STATES INJURED)

Now look I’m not saying don’t support troops and that you should absolutely NOT go into the military.  I’m just saying don’t it seem odd that they spend 1.4 billion to get you to join?  How many other countries spend anything near that amount to recruit soldiers?  C’mon the Army has a damn NASCAR team; WTF is that all about.  Aren’t you appalled by that?  Young men and women are dying for a cause that’s as noble as king cake, and the ARMY has a freaking NASCAR team!!  WHY do they have a NASCAR team?  ’Cause NASCAR is a great way to show American pride and support the troops,. . NO!  Because NSACAR is REAL popular with Bible belt folks in the south that make a big portion of recruits, right? 
 
So basically, it’s ok to glorify violence if it’s in the right hands.  Violence is ok, it just depends on who you bought it from.  So long as its not one of those dangerous African American rappers who kill so many people, we can have all the violence we want.  They might as well put pictures of guns on the side of the US ARMY NASCAR team cars, that would be cool, right?  We can show actual real live deaths and broadcast political puffery amid ’shock and awe’ campaigns but I’ll be damned if Dr. Dre says the word weed, let alone smoke it.  That’s just nonsense, man.  We think we’re so free, we ain’t free.  We’re sleeping, dreaming that we’re free.  When are we gonna wake up?

Then again, maybe I’m just bugging; “honey, lock your doors, there seem to be alot of rappers around here.”

(Oh and by the way, a message to O’Shea Jackson: Stay True to the Game.)

Major League Baseball’s all time Hit king, Pete “Charlie Hustle” Rose just admitted to betting on the Cincinnati Reds every single night they played while he was manager. Of course he admitted that he gambled in his 2004 autobiography, but I’m not sure that we knew of the magnitude of Charlie Hustle’s gambling habits. Needless to say, Rose was banned amid speculation of gambling by MLB, 15 years ago. Since then, Rose has been able to participate in only TWO MLB events, just two. He has not been eligible for the Hall; he hasn’t had his jersey retired, and he is banned from participating in any on or off the field MLB activities. Of course, Rose did lie about gambling for like 12 or 13 years, but at the end of the day, he admitted his faults. He’s admitted his mistake, and apologized. Clearly, Rose is NOT doing himself a favor by reiterating the depth of his previous gambling habits on Dan Patrick’s ESPN radio show; and I must admin I winced as a read the article about it.  

BUT, Rose has been banned for 15 years. 15 YEARS. I honestly know dudes that have done WAY worse and been incarcerated for far less. Now, I’m not trying to equate incarceration with a lifetime MLB ban, but, . .wait a minute? I AM equating a lifetime MLB ban to incarceration. C’mon, think about it. This man gave his life to MLB. He’s freaking Charlie Hustle for Pete’s sake (pun intended, of course) No one has more hits, no one has more heart; this guy used to slide HEAD FIRST. . . C’MON MAN. . . his name says it all Charlie Hustle, PERIOD. Rose was rookie of the year in 1963, he has three World Series Rings, three batting titles, an MVP, two Gold Gloves and made 17 all star appearances at a record FIVE DIFFERENT positions (2B, LF, RF, 3B and 1B)

Now, he can do no more than watch a game on TV, like any other average Joe; locked out of that part of his life forever. That’s just so unfair. How much money did the owners make off of Charlie Hustle’s Back. How much did major league baseball make off of Charlie Hustle? You know what I mean?

I will say this much, Rose hit the nail on the head when he spoke about the sports writers and media and their apparent shunning of Mark McGuire for the Hall of Fame as a result of allegations of performance enhancing drugs. Big Mac, like Bonds after him and Rose before him; gave it all to the game; and appears to be getting shafted in return. At least with Bonds and Big Mac, they’ve got millions of dollars to retire on. I might shed a tear ‘cause they’re not in the Hall and they deserve it, but admittedly it’s a little tongue-in-cheek. But, I’m not sure if Rose was able to capitalize on the huge contracts endemic to professional sports these days. So where does that leave him? A has been. Charlie Hustle, the has been, his legacy to professional baseball a mere memory, while the league and its ownership continue to cash in.

I guess at the end of the day, I can’t really feel that bad for Pete Rose, at least he had a chance, right? He had a bite at the apple. I guess I’m really writing this, or what I’m really getting at is, if they do this to Charlie Hustle, what’ll they do to me and you. Just average Joes, you know? I ain’t even really get a bite at the apple, know what I’m saying? It’s kinda like what I was saying about Britney Spears. She was beloved, and then the media monsters, just turned on her, you know?

People are so unforgiving, they want you to give it all, and give you nothing in return. You better watch out at your job kid, you might get “Charlie Hustled” you know? Get a lifetime ban from working at IBM, son.

By the way, my blog is not Cooperstown, but for whatever its worth here are the highlights of Pete Roses MLB Career:

• Major League records:
o Most career hits – 4,256
o Most career games played – 3,562
o Most career at bats – 14,053
o Most career singles – 3,315
o Most career total bases by a switch hitter – 5,752
o Most seasons of 200 or more hits – 10
o Most consecutive seasons of 100 or more hits – 23
o Most consecutive seasons with 600 or more at bats – 13 (1968-1980)
o Most seasons with 600 at bats – 17
o Most seasons with 150 or more games played – 17
o Most seasons with 100 or more games played – 23
o Record for playing in the most winning games – 1,972
• Only player in major league history to play more than 500 games at five different positions – 1B (939), LF (671), 3B (634), 2B (628), RF (595)
• National League records:
o Most years played – 24
o Most consecutive years played – 24
o Most career runs – 2,165
o Most career doubles – 746
o Most career games with 5 or more hits – 10
o Modern (post-1900) record for longest consecutive game hitting streak – 44
o Modern record for most consecutive hitting streaks of 20 or more games – 7
• NL MVP Award (1973)
• NL Rookie of the Year Award (1963)
• 17 All-Star selections
• Three World Series rings (1975, 1976, 1980)
• World Series MVP Award (1975)
• Two Gold Glove Awards (1969 and 1970, both as an outfielder)
• Roberto Clemente Award (1976)
• The Sporting News Player of the Year (1968)
• The Sporting News Sportsman of the Year (1985)
• The Sporting News Player of the Decade (1970s)

So, on my way to work this morning I’m waited to cross the street and I see this dude being chauffeured in a GEO Metro with diplomatic license plates.  I’m like, what embassy do YOU work at?  Kazakhstan?  They couldn’t spring for a Towncar? I’d rather ride the Metro than get chaffered in a GEO Metro?  That don’t make no sense. Ok, ok, it wasn’t a Metro it was a Ford Aveo, . .but really. . that’s the same car, you know?  You could only see that kinda thing in DC, a dude sittin’ in the back of an Aveo with a driver?  Thats crazy.

By mid morning I had read a story about Al Sharpton doing some DNA test and finding out that his ancestors were owned by the ancestors of late South Carolina Republican Senator Strom Thurman.  you just gotta laugh at that.  Its ill, ONLY IN AMERICA, right.  You need a chainsaw to cut through the irony of that, you know what I mean?  But it just goes to show you, the legacy of slavery in America.  Thurman’s great great grand kids benefit from their privileged position.  The inter-generational transfer of wealth is ridiculous.  Then you look at a guy like Sharpton, who competes on the same political playing field as these guys and has run for president.  How much HARDER did Sharpton have to work to get to where he is now?  You know what I mean?  First of all, I’m not a racist, I’m a classist.  Be that as it may, it burns me up when white folks say to me ”Why should we have affirmative action, I never owned slaves.”  Yeah whatever.  You never owned slaves but your great great great great grand father did.  And because of that; you’re a Senator.  Meanwhile, Black Senators are almost rarer than Steak Tartare.
 
Anyway, the other day I saw something else crazy on my way to work.  I saw this guy window shopping for booze.  I mean, literally window whopping.  The liquor store had not opened yet; and he’s standing there, talking about which one he’s gonna buy and pointing.  In my mind, I’m like damn, It’s 8:55am?  No one should be thinking about liquor at 8:55?!?!  C’mon dog! 8:55?!?!?  AM?!?  That’s just crazy.

Ya’ll remember Taxicab Confessions on HBO? That show was kinda ill back in the days. People get in the cab, get all freaky and nasty, you know? People talk about their life story; about how they were molested and abused and they’re on drugs etc etc. It was ill to see a person’s true nature.

Well, as a result of that show, I have developed a practice of talking to my cabbies when I catch a cab home at night. Like really talking to them, you know? It’s not just like, ‘how’s the weather’; its more like, ‘how’s the world’. I’m always amazed by the depth and breadth of my conversations with cab drivers. I almost always depart with a new jewel of information, a new perspective.

Last night for example, I had a cab driver from Pakistan. We talked about the war in Iraq. We talked about Pakistan and India being Nuclear powers. I was surprised that he had lived in Nigeria and Europe. He had run business in Lagos and in Delta region of Nigeria.

I think what most Americans fail to develop is an appreciation for everyone else. American’s are very self centered. Call it a vestige of the Monroe Doctrine or Manifest Destiny or just the plain fact that geographically we are somewhat isolated from the rest of the world; but American’s are self centered. We think the world revolves around us, and it doesn’t.

Most cab drivers (and most people who immigrate to America) have a greater global perspective. They understand that, yeah Pakistan is a Nuclear Power but at the same time the GDP of all the Arab nations combined is still less than that of the Spain; who has the lowest GDP in Europe. They know what its like to go without food and water. Not because you don’t have the money to pay the bills, . but simply because there is no infrastructure to provide these resources. Most of the World lives this way; and as Americans we simply cannot comprehend. We cannot see beyond the hood of foreign luxury cars. We can’t understand unless it’s in 1080i Hi def. However, because of his travels and upbringing, my cabbie can speak from a world perspective that echoes the majority of the world. He can speak for that kid in China right now, in a sweatshop. He can speak for Nigerian 419 gangsters. He speaks for the world from a global perspective in a way that many Americans cannot.

My cabbie hypostasized, we will see a resurgence from Africa; we will see the rise of China. I hope he’s right, I hope we see a new shift in global political paradigm. Most Americans can’t even point to China is on a map! You know what I’m saying!? We have no right to wield the power that we do. It’s not all about America. Its a million people in India, man; a BILLION. You feel me? We can’t speak for those people. We can’t impart and define capitalism to them; we can’t define democracy to Iraq. It just gets me sick to think about the disparity in wealth. We Americans are too fat, lazy, drugged-up and self centered to usher in a new global paradigm. America needs to be honest. America needs to make its own taxicab confession. Then again, maybe I’m just buggin, pass the hot wings; VH1 is running an ‘I love New York’ marathon.

You know, my young cousin really liked Britney Spears at one point. I mean, he was like three and he knew the dance moves and the songs. we all thought it was cute. He’s since moved on to Bootylicous Beyonce, like everyone else for that matter, but that’s a different story.

Today’s story is about Britney Spears. I thought about writing something about her about two weeks ago. I was just gonna pose the question, “How long will it be before Britney Poses in Playboy?” You know? I wanted to start the official countdown. It seemed as though her life after K-fed was plummeting into an abyss of drugs and alcohol. Its shameful that it has come to such a pass for Ms. Spears, who was once a media darling and as clean as Prius.

The interesting thing here is that the media is covering this like its ‘news’. Is this the insatiable America hunger for celebreality, OR is this just seedy journalism, paparazzi gone wild? I look at a guy like Barry Bonds. He never got along with the media, so when the media gets a chance to take a dig at Barry, of course they take advantage. Or you look at OJ or Michael Jackson etc etc. These are guys who the media has characterized as monsters. Not to say that it was without warrant, but the media outlets seemed insatiable in their hunts for new info. I mean, even Dave Chapelle was portrayed as a wild crazy dude who left $50 million on the table and flew to South Africa to smoke weed and drink or whatever.

But then I look at Britney; Poor little no-panties-wearing-hanging-out-with-Paris Britney. And the media has hopped all over her. Is the media supplying a need or is the media force feeding us?

It’s interesting to see the unflinching eye of the media just totally ‘cover’ a story, you know? About Britney Spears of all people. I mean I’m talking about news crawlers and news specials and breaking news briefs on E! and the style channel. You know what I mean? I question whether the media is supplying a demand. Is the average American that concerned about Britney’s hair? And more immediately, what do I tell my young cousin about Britney? How do I explain Britney’s Burnout to a child?

I think that the media is part of the ’soma’ of today. We’ve got unending news coverage of ‘nonsense’, that’s supposed to make us feel better about ourselves. We’ve got reality TV that’s supposed to entertain us. Reality TV is like an intersection of Huxley’s ‘Soma’ concept and Andy Warhol’s statement about every American having 15 minutes of fame. The media is like a drug, a mind deafening drug.

I refuse to think that this is how we define ourselves as Americans. I don’t think that we really want to watch or read about this stuff. Our television programming is just straight gutter, with the news media leading the way. It’s no wonder that I don’t watch the news. I don’t even read the New York Times. I read the Post. The post is 25 cents and its straight garbage. The Times portrays itself as this upper crusty work of editorial art; but it’s the same nonsense and propaganda, it just costs more. I don’t feel bad when I line my birdcage with the Post, ’cause that’s where it belongs. I wouldn’t feel so bad, if I could line by birdcage with Fox News and CNN and all the rest of the Pseudo TV news, ’cause that’s where it belongs.

Now, I know why Public Enemy had media Assassin Harry Allen.

Britney Bald

The other day I was listening to Donny Simpson’s morning show on WPGC. I have take to listening since because I like local radio and I have never really appreciated the behemoth that is the Steve Harvey Morning Show. At any rate, Donny and his son DJ are sometimes a little too touchy feely for me in the morning. Last week he was playing Nas Hip Hop is dead. Donny’s daughter called up and complained about the song. Nas is saying ‘kill the dj’ and my dad is a DJ, she said. I thought to myself, why is Nas metaphor being taken so literally? But whatever.

Slowly but surely I would catch little blurbs here and there; people commenting on Hip Hop being dead. Apparently, Outkast and a few others have made little comments about hip hop not being dead. I just heard what Young Jeezy had to say about it on Monie Love’s radio show.

Now young Jeezy’s album is supposed to be the truth. I know a few people whose opinion I value who have stated that Jeezy is the hottest thing out right now. I personally never really got into Jeezy, sometimes I like my hip hop hard to find. You know? I like steak as opposed to baby food. You know? Not taking away from what anyone has done, because honestly when jeezy was on Donny Simpson’s morning show, Jeezy come off like a saint; food to the Katrina victims, outreach to the youth, etc etc. So big ups to Jeezy.

BUT, Jeezy did not come off the same way on Monie Love’ show. He actually come off quite abrasive. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but c’mon people. Hip Hop is Dead is a metaphor. I cannot see how someone who has any respect for hip hop, NOT understand this as a metaphor for the current paradigm in the music. I’m not saying there are not dope albums out right now. And clearly Jeezy’s may be among some of the better projects, however, Hip Hop is Dead is still a relevant critique.

I think that’s why I like my hip hop hard to find sometimes, you know? Back in the days you couldn’t just turn the radio on and hear hip hop. You couldn’t just turn the TV on at any time of day and see hip hop. You know? The comodification of Hip Hop has, to a certain extent, compromised the true essence of the art form. Nas is within his right as a veteran of this music to make critiques which ultimately may push the paradigm shift.

Hip Hop is dead is like your football coach calling you a punk. You may have made some punk moves on the field, but you’re not actually a punk and coach doesn’t think so either, he’s just calling you out so he can get the best out of you. He’s motivating you. Hip Hop is Dead is a rallying cry. If you listen to the record, Nas says that we ALL killed hip hop. He points the finger at us all. We are all guilty. He also says that its not too late, we can fix it. We can do better. It’s the same thing Tony Dungy would say, or Bill Parcels. Don’t take it personally.

It seems like Jeezy took it personally and it really disappointed me. He told Monie Love hip hop ain’t dead, just wait till my first week numbers come out. Just what the hell does first weeks record sales have to do with Hip Hop and whether it’s dead or not (‘cause surely he wasn’t trying to say that because he sells a lot of records that hip hop aint dead; is he?) At then end of the day. Hip Hop is dead is a metaphor or a critique or a rallying cry. Please do not take it literally.

BUT, maybe I’m just bugging. Maybe I’m just old and maybe I should just return to listening to “The Symphony” with Craig G, Master Ace, Kool G Rap and Big Daddy Kane.

I really wish the media would leave Barry Bonds alone. At this point in time its becoming annoying. I cannot go very far into any ESPN broadcast without hearing something about Barry Bonds. I’ve honestly tuned it out. The other day I was watching the Annual Spelling Bee and they had a crawler on the bottom reporting breaking news about Barry Bonds! ESPN has no shame when it comes to covering Barry, nor do most other sports news broadcasts.

Why is this? Well, because Barry Bonds was a private guy early on in his career. He didn’t do interviews. He didn’t get along with the media. He got into altercations and fights with them. SO, . now the media is using this as an excuse to demonize Barry, to get back at him.

Well, I submit to you that a scar on Barry is a scar on Baseball. Right now this man just surpassed the babe! Baseball is alive, people are watching, there’s alot of good young talent (Mets), alot of underachieving well paid talent (Yankees) but all in all, . baseball has clearly rebounded from its lockout days. MLB capitalized on the homerun race between Sammy Sosa and Mark McGuire. The Red Sox won the series, the White Sox won the series. The fans are back. So, now we have another chance to capitalize on a great achievement by a great ball player, . and all we get is mud slinging. Steroids, drugs, . illegality, attitudes and its all coming up next; on SportsCenter. After of course, the Congressional hearings. .

Mark McGuire and Sosa, used steroids I’m sure. There ain’t no way you can look at a McGuire rookie from 1985 (he looked like a coat rack) and not see a tremendous difference when he broke the single season homerun record (he looked like a tree trunk) Now, that alone does not mean he did steroids. but c’mon. He admited to using andro and Canseco said they used it in his book. Sometimes where there is smoke there is fire.

More importantly, no one was really talking about steroids back then, we were just enjoying the home run race. ” . . back , back over the left field warning track. . he got all of that one!” But now, when Mr Bonds is doing his thing, . we wanna change the game up? When he started catching up to speed, they wanna change up the tempo.

Well, MLB owners the same way that you may feel justified in the media coverage of Bonds, b/c its just “chickens coming home to roost”, is the same way I’ll feel if and when there is a backlash in Major League baseball. If Barry loses credibility then so does baseball.

So, I implore the ownership and management of baseball to prevent this from going any further. Put pressure on the major media outlets. There’s no ‘I’ in team. you guys should be in it together. Because if one guy is using steroids, then who else was. Are we gonna do a historical test of alleged steroid users before they enter Cooperstown? C’mon. And quite honestly, I don’t think that most fans even care about this stuff. They only care b/c its getting the attention. Lets face it, ticket prices are getting so expensive that the average person can’t even afford to go to a game anymore, let alone care about who’s juiced or not. MLB should, simply institute a stringent drug policy going forward, and that’s it. Let sleeping dogs of the past lie. The more skeleton’s pulled from the closet of MLB’s past the greater the chance the chickens will come home to roost for everyone.